A worker checks the quality of newly arrived coffee beans in 2006. Drinking coffee and exercising may prevent skin cancer by killing off cells damaged by the sun's ultraviolet-B (UVB) radiation, said a study of hairless laboratory mice published Monday.

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I bought this top in two colors cos it was going for 20% for every two tops, but the other tops weren't so nice.

P.S. I'm not digging my nose in the picture. Lol.

Went to Vivocity for dinner, haven't been here in a while. There's the Simpsons family in life size at the GV Cinema and I took a photo with them. Wanted to hook my arm onto Homer and act like a mistress, but his hand was in the pose to hold a remote (that's already gone missing) and I had nothing to hook onto. Lol.


And then there were these huge bear bricks outside Tenchi. I like the Spiderman one. :D




Mother Garden had these really nice doll houses, and doggie clothes. I nearly bought a pair of bunny bedroom slippers, but they didn't have any new stock and the ones on display were dirty. :( I went Vivocity to look for a box to hold my face medicine, but couldn't find anything suitable. :/

Went around the office with CS and Jac to sell coupons for our booth at the charity carnival as well as say hi to people I haven't met in years. The Corp Sales guys were most shocked to see me back, everybody else just said welcome back. Lol.

Saw that scene above while walking around. So wasteful. :x

After brushing my teeth in the toilet. Lol.

Hey, swee boh? From wink. Thanks Jaye for pointing it out to me. :D

Ling recommends some other place. Gonna do price check when I get home. :p

My mom says I look like I'm wearing a school uniform. My dad likes my shoes. :D

Lol! Utada has the same hairstyle as I do! We both look like Guu now. Orz

My Uber Bed!


Love The Wardrobe


Using my mom's ugly blue bedsheets for the moment, until she brings me bedsheets shopping this weekend. :) I'm gonna get flowery ones!

We put the candles on the fried pig's trotters. LOL.

My mom agreed to let me have the study room, so I started clearing out the room and cleaning it as well as giving it a fresh coat of paint (the color is called Cheer!). Marvin came over and helped with the painting and moving of stuffs. It's just like old times where we spent our time chatting and having fun, and we were as companionable as can be. He's already gotten over the breakup. :x We spent the whole of Saturday clearing the room and painting it.

Before: Room Covered in Fascination


After: Room Covered in Cheer

My dad asked me to develop the photo of us and my mom that we took during commencement day so that he can put it in his wallet. This really touched me a lot. I cried when I told Marvin about it. You know, when I was a kid and scored Top 3 placing in primary school, I didn't even get a present? In fact, my form teacher gave me more gifts for my efforts than my own parents. I'm so touched that my dad wants to keep a photo of my commencement in his wallet that I totally feel that the hell I went through all 3 years was really worth it.

My dad even brought me furniture shopping today. He didn't explicitly say it out, but I think it's to reward me for my efforts all this while. I was so elated at Ikea, like a kid overwhelmed by the choice of toys available, and I chose a set of furniture that looks like the ones used by Nana (hachi) in Nana. :) I'm gonna get frilly curtains and flowery bedsheets for my new double bed next. :D

I always feel bad when people spend on me, prolly because my own parents don't. But in recent years, they have spent so much on my education, my facial medicine (too bad it doesn't work anymore, and all our efforts have been wasted. :( ), my braces, I feel so much love from them in recent years that I never felt when I was young. Whenever I'm rushing my work through the night, my mom will brew liang teh for me, and my dad will come into my room and chat with me and ask me (i) not to worry about schoolwork, (ii) get some sleep or (iii) not worry about work. When I was looking for a job, he even told me that it's ok if I can't get a high paying job, he wants me to do something I like instead of worry about supporting them. I am so determined to earn more so that they can live an easier life. I don't really like my dad driving a cab cos I know how tiring driving can be. :/

Actually, I'm thinking of throwing out both the chairs in my room cos the cushions have gone flat, and getting just one single chair, but I really like my dad coming into my room, sitting next to me and just chatting. Maybe I'll replace them with two other hachi-ish chairs. :)

If not for the braces op, I could have earned some money by now. :( I have so many plans but no money to do anything about them.

Anyway, I wanna move into the study room (cos it's way bigger than my room) and get myself some really girly furniture. Inspiration from some sites listed on decor8. I want something like the rooms in the pictures below. White furniture, with nice bedsheets. :)

I find it amusing when people tell me that gu niang stuff suits me, cos I always thought that I'm a tough girl. Lol. Anyway, plan to buy new bedroom furniture within half a year of working. :D

I bought myself a bag for work (my mom says it looks auntie) and a new wallet (cos my old one chui chui) and the book The Five People You Meet In Heaven. I was previously reading The Tipping Point, but it's like reading my HYP readings all over again, I couldn't finish it. Lol. And my niu friend lent me The 100 Simple Secrets of Happy People.

Anyway, I hate shopping. So hard to find something I like. My feet feel so tired now. :(

I'm selling my gaming posters too! Clickie!

Saw these mannequins at IKEA yesterday afternoon and found them cute, so I took pictures of them.

Then met Weiguang, Wanting and Gunawan at Bugis to get JJ's present. We had dessert at Liang Seah Street while waiting for her to finish her Jap class. I had 木瓜牛奶! Lol! I hope it will perform some magic! HAHAHA.



木瓜牛奶

GMasked

I gmasked my phone at Suntec after my commencement yesterday. Wanted to do transparent for both sides, but thought that the back will be a little plain, so I did glittery flowers.

Will be sticking my swarovski crystals on the front when I'm free. :)

Mama and Papa


APAPA!


Throw Higher!


Presents (looks like JJ is piggybacking me. Lol)


Pi Sai for NUS!

Sleeping Oreo (Night mode)


Gerbera


Gerberas


Gerberas

Sian man, all my electronics spoil at the same time. My digicam can only take black pictures now, and my M3lite is not reading my SD Card at all. Need to buy so many things to replace, but where got money?!

List of things to buy:

• Digicam My dad has an unused Konica Minolta Z2 :)
  
• PDA (it died when I started school, how convenient -_-)
  
• R4
  

Btw, I'm clearing my comics at $1 per book, please donate to me if you're interested in them. Hahaha. Clickie.

I caught Transformers with my cousins earlier, and Optimus Prime is still my fav! Plus he's a damn cool 18 Wheeler! With a great paint job! :D

You know there's this arcade game where you drive an 18 wheeler and attempt to deliver goods and whatnot? That's one of my favorite games. Haha, it feels so song to be turning that huge ass steering wheel. :D

You know how I always interpreted that? These were people so hungry for love that they were accepting substitutes. They were embracing material things and expecting a sort of hug back. But it never works. You can't substitute material things for love or for gentleness or for tenderness or for a sense of comradeship.

I'm reading Tuesdays with Morrie. And that's quoted from the book. It felt oh-so-true for me that I HAD to blog about it. And I can't blog on my phone without a picture so I snapped a shot. Lol.

So I broke up with Marvin during the weekend.

What Triggered It?
On Friday night, he came home from work and gamed into the night. The table lamp, and keyboard tapping kept me up. I told him, "Hey, I'm trying to sleep here, can you like off the lamp or block it so it's not shining on me?". He said, Don't worry, I'll be done soon. So I tried to sleep, but couldn't. As I lay there, completely awake, thoughts ran through my mind.

I had my wisdom teeth operation last December, and when he came over, he wouldn't let me sleep at night too. He wanted to talk. I thought it would be perfectly alright to talk when I'm awake, considering that I need the rest to heal and recuperate. But no, he wouldn't let me sleep, and I refused to talk. I cried. I cried till I choked, and no, there were no hugs from him, saying "Hush, go to sleep, we'll talk tomorrow, ok?". No affection. At all. He just wanted to talk, and told me that I am only thinking of myself if I want to sleep and not talk about his issues.

And so drawing from that experience and as I lay there awake, I thought, what if we had gotten married, and I had just given birth to a child? Will I not be allowed to rest as well? If the answer is yes, it's going to be an extremely sad life. I decided then and there, that no, I don't want a life like this. When morning came, I stirred and he woke up, whining that he just got to bed and that I should let him sleep. I looked at him and said, I didn't sleep a wink last night. You said you'd be done soon, but no, you slept in the morning. I asked him, so you come here, and you game, and then you sleep and you go work the next day. What is the difference between you gaming at home and gaming at my place? For the past month (or maybe couple of months), when he arrived at my place he'll just plonk himself in front of the computer and game. Sometimes I bring him his dinner and then clear his plate. He doesn't even ask, "How does your chin feel today?" before proceeding to become a 废人 in front of the PC.

I dunno man, I seriously think my requirements in this relationship is damn low? I don't mind if he doesn't ask me how's my day, how's my chin and all that, but I really think that at the minimum, unwell/sick people should be allowed to rest.

There was one time in school, when I cried over a project grade. People who know me will know I don't care for grades. But what happened was, was that I got a lousy grade. I went to see the lecturer and he was unable to justify how he arrived at that grade. There were a bunch of other students waiting to see him while I was there too. Anyway, there should have been a grading guideline for that project, because it would have just been a checklist of functionalities that you either have or don't have. But no, he was unable to produce anything like this. So why did I cry? Already hating the school culture for the people in it, I felt like it was the end of my world if I am unable to score based on my abilities. I mean, if they're just gonna give you randomly generated grades, what are the chances of me getting the grade I deserve? The world felt so 黑暗 at that moment that I cried in school. And then instead of comforting me, Marvin scolded me for crying. O_o His take on this is that other people will perceive that he made me cry, and he doesn't want that. Like wtf. His friend, who was there, was appalled at what Marvin said. And I'm sure that if I'm not his friend's gf, he would have comforted me. From that day onwards, I accept that I cannot receive emotional comfort from this guy. I can live with it.

The Whole Fucking Problem
When we got together, I had no romantic feelings for this person at all, but he was generally nice and sweet to me and we are (still are!) such great companions that we can talk about anything under the sun, and enjoy movies and games together. But no, he doesn't make my heart skip a beat, doesn't make me want to kiss him till his lips are sore... I tried to love him and tried to make it work. Whenever things start to go a little wrong, I'll bring it up and we'll talk about it and try to solve it. School has always been hectic for me cos everybody just plainly does not have initiative, but I tried to continue gaming. There was one point in time when I stopped for a while, and I found our conversations waning. I couldn't understand what he was talking about and couldn't participate in the conversation. I made myself continue gaming just to keep it going.

Things are immaterial to me. I'm not touched when he bought all those stuff like Nintendo DS Lite, my shiny pink handphone, my hip hop happening maroon shoes. I like these items cos I simply like them, but buying me things doesn't touch my heart. Same as running me through dungeons in World of Warcraft. I like morning kisses, good night kisses, hugs when I'm feeling down, someone to sayang my head. But he's not a particularly touchy feely person, so there wasn't much of it, and my heart was never touched completely by him.

I felt guilty most of the time in the relationship. I felt that I was wasting his time and efforts as I was unable to bring myself to love him. I admit that it's my fault for being so busy with school, that I couldn't manage the relationship properly. But he didn't complain either? And was completely happy being a gamer with the bf/gf tag. I dunno man, I think if it was any other guy, he'll prolly tell me to suckit. :x So on the whole, I was really really hoping that he dumped me. But he didn't.

Closure
I'm really sorry I wasted his time and efforts. I do, seriously. :( I dunno what else I can do to make up to him other than let him murder me, but no can do. And then, I had to speak to him harshly on the phone after the breakup just to kill all his hopes. >.< He kept calling with propositions on making it work again. If I respond and participate in the discussion, doesn't it mean I'm open to make it work? And I'm not interested in making it work! :/

Other things
Ever since Pork, I never blogged about my love life. That was because he repeatedly told me that he didn't like dirty laundry being washed in public, and I respect that, even though a blog is supposed to be an outlet for my thoughts. But ya, so I've never really blogged about Marvin until today. So why did I write this entry? I don't know man. I just woke from a nap and it seemed appropriate.

We switched to SNBB from MaxOnline Ultimate since yesterday, and I must say, it sucks.

Before we switched to Ultimate, we were on the normal 2MB MaxOnline plan, and the Starhub staff ALWAYS heard from me (game performance issues, blah blah), and then my brother got us Ultimate, cos Starhub was giving away stuff, and life became good. Recently, he signed up for SNBB cos Singtel is giving away Lenovo notebooks, but didn't tell me when we were gonna make the switch. I woke up yesterday thinking the Internet was down, haha.

According to the specs, the only difference between Ultimate and this shitty plan is 1Mbps of upload speed, but I lag when I'm chatting on MSN and I couldn't even watch the Transformers trailer smoothly. Wth man, seriously. >.>

I was clearing out my stuff earlier and I found a shitload of old passport sized photographs. And you know, BJ once commented that I suddenly 变美 after poly. Judging based on the photographs, she's right! LOL.

Secondary School 1 - 4 (Left to Right)

I wore spectacles for a while when I was diagnosed with myopia in Primary 5. But it's sorta like lazy eye. My right eye is lazier so it has a blurrer vision when forced to focus on its own. I don't wear spectacles anymore. Anyway it was a school rule to have short hair, so.. ya. Lol. At this moment, it's like the first time I cut my hair short since Secondary School.

P.S. I think I looked like Psyche in that photo that was taken when I was in Sec 2.

Poly Yr 1 - 3 till M1 1st Year (Left to Right)

I used to have that 庶务二科 hairstyle for a while, cos I was such a huge fan of Makiko Esumi from Shomuni, but I had problems with the parting, was always unable to let it fall naturally like hers.

It's a pity we're not forced to take photos annually in NUS, otherwise I can track my changes from that nice photo taken before M1, till now. Lol.